#####
I changed my i Pod name to Titanic.
It's syncing now.
#####
When chemists die, they barium.
#####
Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
#####
I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid.
He says he can stop any time.
#####
How does Moses make his tea ?
Hebrews it.
#####
I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.
Then it dawned on me.
#####
This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club,
but I'd never met herbivore .
#####
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
I can't put it down.
#####
I did a theatrical performance about puns.
It was a play on words.
#####
They told me I had Type-A blood,
but it was a Type- O.
#####
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
#####
Why were the Indians here first?
They had reservations.
#####
Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory.
I hope there's no pop quiz.
#####
Energizer bunny arrested.
Charged with battery.
#####
I didn't like my beard at first.
Then it grew on me.
#####
How do you make holy water?
Boil the hell out of it!
#####
Did you hear about the cross eyed teacher who lost her job
because she couldn't control her pupils?
#####
What does a clock do when it's hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
#####
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me!
#####
Broken pencils are pointless.
#####
I tried to catch some fog.
I mist.
#####
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
#####
England
has no kidney bank,
but it does have a
Liverpool.
#####
I used to be a banker,
but then I lost interest.
#####
I dropped out of communism class
because of lousy Marx.
#####
All the toilets in
New York’s police stations have been stolen.
Police have nothing to go on.
#####
I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
#####
Haunted French pancakes give me the crepes.
#####
Velcro - what a rip off!
#####
Cartoonist found dead in home.
Details are sketchy.
#####
Venison for dinner?
Oh deer!
#####
Earthquake in
Washington;
obviously government's fault.
#####
I used to think I was indecisive,
but now I'm not so sure.
#####
Be kind to your dentist.
He has fillings, too.
#####
